Dance Me to the End of Love
by xxx-angelin-xxx
Summary: They were a great couple. Lucy and Lorcan, Lorcan and Lucy. They had the kind of relationship that makes you certain it will last forever; easy, stable and secure. What more could they ask for?


**Dance Me to the End of Love**

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They were a great couple. _Lucy and Lorcan, Lorcan and Lucy_. They had the kind of relationship that makes you certain it will last forever. It was easy because they understood one another more than themselves; because they didn't need to talk to realize what the other wanted.

It wasn't passion, ferocious and devastating; it was love, calm and secure.

What more could they ask for?

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Much more, apparently.

Lorcan broke up with her, after two years of dating. He was perfectly nice to her, and at the same time perfectly honest. There was no stuttering, no. She hates him more for that; she hates the fact that he's still nice and gentle with her, like she needs comfort. She hates how he's the one _winning _the relationship, the breakup, her heart.

Lucy Weasley was always the one winning. And suddenly she's the one losing- her heart, her faith, her friend, her lover. He's with _her,_ whoever _she_ is. Lucy can't believe he got over her- he got over _them_- so easily, so fast. She can't trust him anymore. She can't trust anyone anymore.

She wants to scream. She wants to fight. She wants to do something- anything, as long as it makes her feel better, as long as it makes her forget the pain. But, for the first time in her life, she can't. She's unable to do anything but stare at them and break a little more as feelings, unwelcome thoughts and memories, overwhelm her.

.

Sometimes it hurts so much that she would do anything for that fire to stop; it is killing her slowly and painfully. At these times she hides herself away from everyone and everything; she fakes smiles for her parents until she can close the door and just cry. At these moments she believes that he is ruining her, destroying everything good in her. She feels like it will never stop.

She tells her friends that their words help her and she isn't lying- she never was one to lie, after all. Their words make her forget, make her laugh; only the feeling that there are people who care for her gives her hope. For a moment, it stops. She knows it will start over again. She knows the pain won't leave her- it's like a sickness not done with her yet- but for that short time, it stops.

Sometimes her friends are all that it takes to stop the hurt, others she has to cry and mope around for hours, maybe days, and then it will be over because there are no more tears- for now. These times she manages to convince herself that he doesn't matter, that he doesn't exist. She makes herself forget how they were friends once, how he made her feel special- like no one had before.

When she sees him now, he's somewhat different and all she wants- even if she will never admit it, not even to herself- is to find out what he's thinking. There are times when he acts normally again, like nothing has changed, and she laughs and thinks maybe, just maybe, he's okay.

But there are other times that he doesn't talk - not to her, not to anyone. He's indifferent, he's cold and to her he's another person. He's not the one she likes, he's not her friend- he's a stranger to her at these times. A stranger that looks a lot like the one she loves, and that _hurtshurtshurts_.

And it's the stranger most of the times, the one that's there, not her friend, and she cries herself to sleep. But as soon as she gives up hope he's back again, teasing her, staring at her, being normal and she realizes she's missed him- oh, how badly she has missed him!

And it's confusing and devastating because he is her first love, and it wasn't supposed to end this way.

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He asks her to dance. It's their Graduation Ball and he comes and asks for a dance. She feels hope inside her once again… And then she realizes he just wants to end it on a good note. From tomorrow they don't have to see each other again.

This is the _e n d_ for them.

_Here comes the grand finale._

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She feels _s i l l y_.

Because she believed this would be a fairytale, with a happy ever after. Because she read the signs wrong and thought that he actually loved her- enough for them to last forever.

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She feels _b r o k e n_.

Because her heart is smashed into pieces but somehow she can still feel. And that's a curse.

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She feels _d e l u d e d_.

Because suddenly he seems like a different person, not the one she loved.

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She feels _w a s t e d_.

She loved him. So much. And now… now that it's over and he's acting like that, she wonders why she ever bothered with him.

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_And you never loved me, someone get me outta this place_

But she can't deny him the dance, she can't deny herself. So, she stays there, stuttering responses to his cold, awkward questions and wishing she was strong enough to get out, to get away- wishing someone would save her from this.

* * *

This is my entry for the **Alliterated Pairings Competition**:

**Pairing**: Lucy/Lorcan

**Song**: Outta Here by Esmee Denters

**Prompt**: Stuttering

Beta read by **Dragons in the Orchard** whose work and comments I always appreciate:)


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